Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet
by The Pink Tonberry
Summary: How could a bumbling fool like Steiner ever win the favor of the beautiful Beatrix? You can be sure it wasn't easy. (Complete)
1. Default Chapter

FF9-Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet

Author's Note: This is for those who've begged me time and again to make a romantic fanfic involving Steiner and Beatrix. While I don't doubt that those two are right for one another, I do feel that the romance would be bumpy at first. C'mon, Beatrix and Steiner??! I almost think Garnet and Steiner would be more likely in a nice May/December relationship. Heh, yeah, I've already written that. I don't think those two belong together, honestly. Anyway, I'm going to try to portray Steiner's courting Bea as realistically as I can. I just feel sorry for the big guy ^_- 

Disclaimer: All characters portrayed herein are property of Square Soft. This story is fictional and not for distribution without the permission of the author (mercybrand@hotmail.com). I do not own these characters in any way, I just play narrator to their lives.

Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet

  
While the buzz of court droned on around him, Steiner rolled his shoulders to relieve his fatigue. He hid a yawn behind a wide grimace and glanced sidelong at his counterpart on the other side of the Queen. Beatrix stood there, strong, proud, and unmoving as a statue. Her covered eye faced him, but he was certain she was watching the proceedings on the floor with eyes as keen as a dragon's. Steiner straightened and returned his gaze to the floor.

After a time, his eyes unfocused and he began to roll his plans over in his mind. After court, he'd take his leave of Queen Garnet and try to engage Beatrix in a casual conversation on her way to the barracks. 'How was your exercise this morning?' No, that would be awkward to ask. 'Did you enjoy breakfast this morning?' No, no, he thought. Beatrix was too practical. Breakfast would have just been bread, fruit, and maybe an egg. 'How about the weather?' How pathetict, he thought resignedly. 

Steiner shuffled the numbness from his feet and risked a glance to Queen Garnet seated beside him. His smile was small and private while he continued scanning the room. He had no problems speaking to his queen, why then, was he having trouble finding words for someone who was practically his equal? Because, he berated himself bitterly, the thought of driving her away-it's just unthinkable.

Court was dismissed while Steiner berated himself internally. He didn't notice until Beatrix crossed the floor and into his field of vision that he had missed his queue. He broke out in a cold sweat and sputtered some quick, garbled excuse to his queen before stumbling after Beatrix. Garnet watched wide-eyed and confused. Had he just said his chocobo was on fire?!

Beatrix heard Steiner's approach, but his cool, gauntlet-clad hand on her shoulder surprised her. She turned, one eye scanning him questioningly. Beads of sweat stood out on his upper lip as he tried to stammer out some statement. Beatrix shook her head, causing those thick curls to bounce over her shoulders. "Captain, I can't understand a word you're saying. Is there an emergency?"

Steiner coughed and quickly removed his hand from Beatrix's shoulder. "Wh-er-emergenceny?! No, no. Everything is under control, General." Steiner straightened and wrung his hands nervously. "I simply wanted to go back to the barracks."

Beatrix knotted her brow. Steiner had been acting stranger than usual lately. Maybe the moons were misaligned? Who knew. She shrugged and turned back to her business with a cooly polite, "Please, don't let me stop you." When Steiner placed a hand on her shoulder again, she bristled with annoyance.

Steiner proposed, "With you," quickly when he saw that familiar irritation in her expression. "Please," he added as an afterthought.

"Fine," Beatrix resigned with a heavy sigh. She crossed the floor and Steiner shuffled after her. "So why-" she began but was cut off by his question.

"How was your weather today?"

"What?" She leered at him curiously.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You were going to ask me something?"

"No-well, yes, but it's not important," she replied. "What did you just ask?"

Steiner's mind went blank. What did he ask? How was breakfast or how was the weather? Which was it? Bad luck be damned, but he couldn't remember. He scratched at his chin and tried again, "Good day?"

He was acting weird. All that fuss for such a simple question? What was Steiner hiding? "It's a routine day," she admitted at length. "Up until the last five minutes." With that, she turned down the hall and placed a hand on the door to her quarters.

"Well, that's good," he responded out of habit. "No! Wait!" He held out his hands as she pushed the door open. "I have something for you?" He pat his hips, chest, and finally remembered that he'd tucked the small piece of paper into his glove. Digging the folded paper out of his glove, he turned it over to her with his chin raised proudly.

Curiosity piqued, Beatrix accepted the paper and unfolded it. She turned it twice until the writing was right side up and then read aloud, "Take dirty undergarments to launders, buy quill, patrol Captain, is this your daily checklist?" she asked in that voice that made clear she wasn't amused. Fed up with his tomfoolery, she flicked the paper his way and retired to her quarters.

Steiner wobbled as the door slammed in his face. The scrap of paper flipped once and then landed on his foot. What had gone wrong? He picked up the paper and read it. It was his daily checklist! Steiner's heart dropped into his hollow stomach. How long had he worked to make that poem perfect for her? He knew he couldn't have caught more than two hours of sleep before the sun rose and he was called to duty. Steiner checked his other glove. Sure enough, the paper with the poem on it was there, but his sweat had caused the ink to run over the expensive paper. Steiner wilted. His knuckles practically scraped the ground as he drug himself back to his quarters and collapsed on his bed.

Before sleep pulled him down into darkness, he prayed for another chance.

  
Author's note: Poor guy. By the way, when I write, I do it with the Yoshitaka Amano illustration of Steiner, not the in-game Steiner. In-game Steiner looks like the ultimate Cure fan with that eyeliner on, eh? Anyway, look! This is my first non-lemon. Woot. More to come  



	2. Of Luck...2

FF9-Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet

Stooped over, Steiner scratched out a few quick letters on the paper in front of him and then slammed down a quick dot at the end of the line of script. He pronounced it finally finished and lifted the paper to the torchlight to read it. Here in the back halls of the castle, he could find the solitude he needed to concentrate on his writing. In a deep, serious voice, he read the poem aloud: 

"At the mere sight of you, my heart races.  
The most captivating, beautiful, and finest of faces.

Your grace, poise, and wisdom inspire me.  
If only I could find the words to tell thee,

Just how I feel.

How can lips convey such deep emotions,  
That far overflow my heart and even the oceans.

When I move to speak,   
I find I am weak,  
And I don't know how to say,

Just how I feel.

I need to tell you simply, quickly, now,  
Without desperation, I'll give you my vow,

I'll love you forever,  
We shall part never,  
And now you well know,

Just how I feel."

Steiner cleared his throat and smoothed the paper back over the table on which he'd been writing. From the staircase up above, he could hear an echoing voice too high-pitched to be his. Steiner lept to his feet and mounted the stairway, glancing up to see one of the knights of Pluto sitting there on his break. The Knight, noticing his Captain's glare, lept to his feet and stood, though sloppily, at attention.

"Breireicht, how long have you been sitting there and listening?" Steiner crossed his arms tightly over his chest. The knight on the stairs above scratched his head and shrugged in embarrassment after a time. Steiner waved it away and then asked, almost a little too eagerly, "How does it sound? Do you think she'll like it?"

Breireicht yawned and resumed his seat on the step. "I'm no writer," the knight admitted. "I'd ask Laudo."

Steiner rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Laudo…" Yes! Laudo was that pacifist that often spent his time 'guarding' the library. Hadn't he mentioned once that he wanted to be a writer? "Excellent idea, Breireicht! You may return to whatever it was you were doing."

Breireicht rumbled a snore as he, without prompting, resumed his nap.

The heavy scent of the molded, musted books assaulted Steiner as he pushed through the doors to the Alexandrian Library. Several scholars milled about, pulling books, replacing them, and perusing. Steiner walked past them on such a direct route that a few of the scholars turned to watch him. In a gruff voice, Steiner summoned Laudo to attention. The young knight scrambled to his feet, spilling the book he'd been reading onto the floor. Steiner nodded once and then leaned close to expect the young man.

Laudo swallowed hard and fought to keep his eyes forward. "A-all's clear here, Captain. C-can I help you?"

Steiner rested a hand on Laudo's shoulder and pulled the poem out of his belt. "I want your opinion as a writer, Laudo. Read this and tell me what you think."

Blinking as if stunned, Laudo fit his glasses on the end of his nose and read the poem quickly. He looked from the paper to his captain and back to the paper again. "Well," Steiner prompted sternly. 

Laudo coughed. He wasn't sure how he could give an honest critique to his superior, but judging by the poem, Steiner was certainly an amateur. "Sir, may I suggest a tried and true poem instead? This is terrific, but you-uh, may want to save it for something more like a wedding vow." Would that work? Laudo certainly hoped so. He huddled down in his armor, watching Steiner consider his words and expecting the giant knight to blow up at him.

Instead, Steiner clapped Laudo on the back, almost launching him forward over his table. Laudo recovered and straightened his glasses. He watched Steiner hopefully and the other knight proclaimed, "You are a genius, Laudo! I'm glad to have you in our ranks."

Laudo raised a finger and interjected timidly, 'I've been meaning to talk to you about that Captain. Back when-"

Steiner waved his appeal away. "Later. Later. First, show me where to find these tried and true poems, so that I may win my love's heart!" Laudo seemed to deflate.

The various scholars purposefully went back to their business as the large knight toured through the aisles. Steiner recited the titles on the spines of the books as he passed. Laudo led the way and after a quick 'Aha!' withdrew a book and thumbed through the pages. "Here we go," the younger knight said as he rotated the book and pointed out a poem to his Captain.

Steiner mouthed the words as he read. A broad smile pulled at the corners of his mouth and he grabbed the book from Laudo's hands. "This is it! This is what will win her. Laudo! Remind me to promote you."

Laudo pulled his glasses off it nose and raised them to protest, but Steiner turned and hurried toward the door while holding the book above his head like a trophy. Laudo sighed, "I should've joined the Alexandrian Tribune."

The back alley near the wharf was quiet for once. Steiner walked along the broken cobblestone looking for some sign of his paramour. A stray cat wandered into his path and stopped to stare at the big knight expectantly. "Wherever could she be?" he asked. The cat seated itself and began licking a paw. Some help that feline was, Steiner thought as he frowned to himself.

"Captain?" 

Steiner turned on his heel to see Beatrix standing with her hands on her hips. His usually goofy expression seemed guilty to her for some reason. "For whom are you searching?" she asked in the same tone with which she commanded her soliders.

The knight raised his chin, somewhat indignant with her tone. She usually wasn't so formal. Maybe she was still mad at him from that last failed attempt a week ago. "I was searching for you, actually."

The General's expression turned haughty. She thought as much. He'd been following her around like a puppy lately and it had become a nuisance. "So, you thought the cat would know where I'd gone?"

Steiner looked around. The cat, still seated in the middle of the alley, gave him a cat-like shrug and lept away. The knight turned back to Beatrix with a ridiculous smile. "Nevermind that. I have something to tell you." Steiner surprised himself with his courage. He hadn't rehearsed the poem he was going to recite to Beatrix. He wasn't even sure how he'd follow up after the poem. Maybe this was it! Yes, it was his time to be smooth.

"Well," Beatrix prompted impatiently.

Steiner cleared his throat and bowed his head thoughtfully. "Your love is like the morning sun," he began in a deep, manly tone. "Cresting the valley of my heart. I wake to the warmth of your passion and to the hope you bring me…" 

"I don't care!" Beatrix yelled.

Steiner choked and turned to face her again. Beatrix was engaged in a conversation with one of the Alexandrian guard. The leotard-clad solider stood at sharp attention while Beatrix listed off some orders. Steiner rubbed the back of his head in confusion. He'd been concentrating so hard on remembering the poem that he hadn't even heard the soldier approach.

"Take five more troops and patrol the perimeter. I don't want any dragons near the city walls, do you understand, soldier?" Beatrix didn't even wait for the solider's nod. Her final word was as much a command as a dismissal, "Now!" The soldier hurried off with her orders and Beatrix turned to Steiner.

"Make certain the knights are on guard. We have a rogue dragon on the west wall. I'm going to oversee their progress now. I suggest you get back to your duties." With that, the general turned and marched off to see to the aforementioned duties.

Silence surrounded the armor clad knight. He just stood there, stunned again by the abrupt nature of his faliure. Snickering in the shadows grew to laughter as soon as General Beatrix was out of sight. "What? Who's there? I, Adelbert Steiner, Captain of the Knights of Pluto, demand you show yourselves now." Steiner rested his hand on his sword and despite that threat, the laughter grew stronger.

Marcus stumbled out of the shadows with one arm over Cinna's shoulder. The two were practically doubled over with laughter. Cinna rubbed a tear from his stubble-roughened cheek. "Ha ha! Cresting the valley ," he snickered, "of my heart??! What a cornball!"

Marcus clasped his hands under his chin and in as feminine a voice as he could manage, cooed, "Oh, Adelbert! Marry me!"

With each passing moment, Steiner's frown grew deeper. His cheeks flushed with anger and he drew his sword. "Stop mocking me!" he roared as he charged the two Tantalus members.

Cinna scrambled out of the way and Marcus, having fought by Steiner's side, avoided the familiar attack easily. "Hey, hey, Cap'n. Settle yourself." Marcus raised his empty hands. He could've drawn his sword to parry the blow, but honestly, he didn't mean anything by the laughter.

Steiner squared off with the bandanna clad man and demanded, "Draw your sword, vagrant! I fight for my honor!"

Cinna took a prudent step backwards and made himself as inobtrusive as possible. If Marcus wanted to pick a fight with the battle-hardened knight, hey, that was his business. Where was his little Garnet doll when he needed it?

Marcus shook his head and dropped his hands to his sides. "Hey, look, I ain't going to fight you, honor or no. I didn't mean anything by it, Steiner, so chill."

The battlerage left Steiner in one long sigh. He sheathed his sword but didn't disarm the frown. "I'll spare your life because you fought alongside me to help save my queen, but if not for that…" he left the threat open, certain that Marcus could fill out the rest.

"Yeah. Well, much appreciated." Marcus rubbed a finger under his nose and stepped forward for a more intimate conversation. "Look. Cinna and I are sorry for laughing, alright? I just never thought I'd see the day when you'd be spouting corney poetry like that."

Suddenly ashamed of himself, Steiner mumbled, "Poetry is a gentleman's art." Yeah, it even seemed like a lame excuse to him. Come to think of it, poetry really wasn't his style, but women loved poetry, right? How could he have failed again?

Cinna stepped forward, then, hands wringing nervously. "So you've got it bad for the General, huh," he asked in his nasal voice.

At Steiner's nod, Marcus clapped the man on his metal-clad shoulder. "Hey, Steiner. You're in good company. We're all guys here, right? We all love gals. It looks like you could use some advice."

Steiner glanced down at Marcus hopefully. "Truly? You would help me after that misunderstanding?"

Marcus and Cinna exchanged sly smiles.

Author's note: Uh oh. Things always get a little more interesting when Tantalus gets involved, huh? ^_^ More to come. (Thanks for your feedback!)


	3. Of Luck...3

"Alright, a little to the left. There, perfect." Steiner listened to Marcus guide him through the darkness. Rather, Marcus guided a blindfolded Steiner while the big knight stretched out his hands to feel for obstacles. "Now, remember what we told you?"

With a dubious expression, Steiner reviewed his romantic mission. "You will lead her to me. On your signal, I will remove my blindfold and confess my love to her."

"Right on!" Cinna piped up from somewhere off to Steiner's left.

"I still don't understand why I have to wear a blindfold," Steiner remarked with a frown.

Barely able to contain his laughter, Cinna opened his hammer, revealing to Marcus that the empty cavity in the hammer's head was ready. Marcus nodded to his partner in crime and then coughed to Steiner. "Well, because, it's supposed to be a surprise for both of you."

Steiner knotted his brow but before he could protest, Marcus gave him a shove through an open door. "C'mon, c'mon or we'll miss our cue!" 

While Marcus fussed over Steiner's positioning, Cinna made a quick lap around the room lifting anything that looked valuable and small enough to fit into the hammer's head. A necklace here, a pair of earrings there, and some of Beatrix's undergarments made for fine trophies. Cinna clutched the panties in his fist wondering if he even wanted to put them up for sale. A meaty fist on the back of his head brought him back from his daydreams. Marcus gave the smaller man a push toward the door and then called out to Steiner, "Now we're going to bring Beatrix in. Remember, when I say 'when' pull off your mask."

Steiner simply nodded.

Cinna tiptoed to the door, one hand clasped firmly over his whiskered face to stifle the laughter. His belly jiggled with the choked snickering. Marcus gave the roly-poly man a firm boot to the butt and then ran to the door Steiner was facing. His rough knuckles rapped on the door three times. "General Beatrix!" he called out in a voice that sounded vaguely feminine. 

Steiner cocked a brow. Weren't they supposed to be leading Beatrix in? Ah well. The swashbucklers must know what they're doing. Those types always get the girl, afterall. The big man rolled his shoulders and waited for his cue with anticipation.

Hearing some noise within the room behind the door, Marcus shuffled away to join Cinna outside the bedroom in the hallway. He closed the door most of the way and watched through the narrow crack. The door on which he'd knocked inched open and upon seeing Beatrix's foot, he yelled, "WHEN!"

At the signal Steiner tore off his blindfold, Cinna and Marcus took flight, and the beautiful general stood in the doorway wrapped tightly in a towel and dripping from her bath. Steiner's jaw hit the floor. Beatrix's hair, usually so carefully groomed rested on her shoulders in dark curlicews. Water glistened on her shoulders and over the tops of her firm white breasts. The towel clung tightly to her curves, straining over her shapely hips and thighs. With a heavy gulp, Steiner forced himself to look back up.

In his stunned state, Steiner was at leisure to watch a furious flush build up from Beatrix's chest, to her neck, and finally to spread across her cheeks. He only had a slim moment to react before she swept up a nearby wooden chair and lifted it over her head. "GET OUT!" she roared.

Steiner backed away, raising his hands to shield his face. "But Beatrix, I-"

"GET OUT YOU PERVERT!" She swung the chair, turning an otherwise harmless piece of furniture into a deadly weapon.

"But Beatrix, you don't under-" For the second time in a month, her door slammed in his face. "-stand," he finished with a pathetic sigh. The moment of regret and fear was over, though, as the fires of righteous indignation swelled up from his chest. He clutched his fists and jumped up and down. How could have been tricked so easily?! He had to get them. But wait, he couldn't just call the guards. What if he had to explain what just happened? With a growled curse, he ran down the hall, hopefully after the two Tantalus members. He saw no sign of them down each new hallway. The female guards watched him curiously. Nothing seemed out of place so how could they have gotten away?

With a grim expression, Steiner stalked directly out of the castle and toward the city proper. The gondola ride across the moat did little to cool his anger. After it docked on the opposite shore, Steiner leapt out of the gondola, passed through the arch and into the market court. He stomped a path directly to his right and down the back alley. Alexandrian citizens gave him a wide berth. Steiner knew it wouldn't be prudent to draw his sword. Not yet anyway. He didn't want the people to panic and he didn't care to explain to the Alexandrian guard what his little vendetta was about. As he turned the corner, he could see the underside of the Prima Vista just over the rooftops. "DAMMIT!" he roared. They were getting away.

Waving a hand over his head, he chased after the theater ship, ordering it to stop. Not until he reached the end of the alley did he realize the futility of his actions. Embarrassed and still outraged, he slammed a fist into a nearby wall, chipping away the yellowed plaster. 

"Whoa! What in tarnation?" a sweet voice behind him demanded. "Cap'n Steiner? That you honey? What's got yer goat?"

Steiner turned and raised a finger to her face. Furious words gathered on his tongue, and spittle foamed on his lips. Ruby wasn't a part of Tantalus anymore, though, and to accusing her of what just happened would be wrong. He lost his bluster quickly as he stared into her wide, surprised eyes.

"Ah'm sorry, Cap'n. Whatever Ah said" Ruby took a prudent step back and hugged her bag of groceries.

Steiner lowered his finger and released a heavy sigh. "No, ma'am. You're not the one who deserves my anger. When I catch your friends Marcus and -and whatever that shorter man's name is, I'll show them my wrath!"

Ruby 'uh-ohed' and glanced up at the retreating theater ship. "Now what could Marcus an' Cinna have done tah go an' upset ya so much, sir?"

In embarrassment, Steiner related the story to Ruby. As they talked, Ruby led him back down to her small theater where Lowell was up on stage reciting some angsty poetry. Ruby handed off her grocery bag to an employee and joined Steiner at a table. "Well, Ah do declare. Next time Ah see those two, they're gonna get a tongue lashin'." She rested a hand on Steiner's armored shoulder and lent him a sympathetic expression. "Ya just can't mess around with a person's heart like that where love's concerned."

Steiner just looked defeated and spent as he stared into the mug of mead Ruby had provided. Certainly the young actress was being nice to him, but he'd had enough of strangers' sympathy or supposed symapthies for the day. He paid her little mind as she kept talking. Instead, he looked for what he might say to Beatrix to convince her to forgive him. What he had been led to do was very ungentlemanly.

"Steiner-honey, are ya'll listenin' tah me?" Ruby stared at the big knight from across the table.

"Hm? My apologies madam. Of course I'm listening. Please go on." The response was mechanical, but he really didn't care until she spoke the magic word.

"Queen Garnet."

Steiner snapped to attention and peered Ruby in the eye. "Excuse me?"

"Ah said, Ah need tah speak with Queen Garnet, honey. Ya'll think ya can arrange that, hm?"

With a suspicious eye, Steiner finally nodded. "I can. What do you plan on doing?"

"Ah plan on helpin' ya get tah yer woman, man!" Ruby smiled as she stood. "Don't worry. We gals are on good terms, the Queen an' me. Ya'll just gotta leave it ta us an' we'll get you an' the general together." Her confidence was infectious, but Steiner was still wary of her playful wink. Then again, if she were dealing with the Queen there was little way that he could be led into a trap. Garnet hadn't really been in a mischievous mood since losing Zidane.

The big knight finally conceeded a nod. He stood, informing Ruby, "I will find you audience tomorrow, madam. A messenger will be sent to notify you." Then in a less formal tone, he said, "Thank you for your concern for my welfare. I take back what I said about those Tantalus scoundrels."

Ruby chuckled and shook her head. "Naw. Don't ya'll take that back. They certainly derserve it, honey. Don't ya worry yer head about it, though. Ruby'll take care of ya! Go on now, git, ya crazy lovebird."

Steiner allowed the woman a brief smile and then took his leave. After topping the stairs out of the theater he realized how much he was going to dread facing Beatrix for the rest of the night. Maybe he could just avoid her by taking up a patrol in the lower floors of the castle.  


Author's note: I've been so mean to Steiner. In the next chapter I'll make it up to him ^_-


	4. Of Luck...4

FF9-Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet

For an enitre night, Steiner avoided Beatrix. It was likely a relief to them both as Steiner had been doing little else but persuing Beatrix and the general did her best to avoid him. Instead, Steiner sought Garnet's company. He went in with the intention of informing her that Ruby requested a private audience. However, when he got a moment alone with her, he discovered his Queen sitting quietly in her room and stroking a length of lace.

Steiner bowed quickly. He was given permission to enter, but he thought that perhaps wasn't the best time. Garnet looked up and offered a sad smile. "Steiner, you don't have to do that when no one's watching, you know?"

The knight stood upright and coughed discreetly into his fist. He then spoke a gentle, "Maybe I should come back another time, your majesty?"

Garnet shook her head quickly and tucked the bit of lace away. She stood and straightened her gown. "No, please stay. To be honest, I could use some company tonight. Besides, I see you every day and we never talk." Crossing the room to her tea table, she gestured to a seat for Steiner. The knight rushed over and helped the queen into her seat. "Oh! Thanks." Her smile was sweet as Steiner held her chair for her and then eased her closer to the table.

"My pleasure," Steiner rumbled. He then claimed the seat she'd offered him. Under his armor and sheer size, the delicately crafted chair seemed like a fragile toy. He did his best to make himself comfortable.

Lifting a slender crystal bell between her fingers, Garnet rang for some tea to be brought in. Normally, she would regret having servants do this and that for her, but she knew Steiner enjoyed the pleasures of nobility. That, and she was just too weary to make a fuss. "So what did you want to talk to me about, Steiner?" She took up an informal, friendly tone with the big man, hoping he'd follow suit.

"Well, your ma--," he stopped as Garnet raised a hand. She obviously didn't want to suffer the formality tonight. Steiner nodded and grudgingly restated, "Well, Ruby, the young woman who used to be with Tantalus." He waited for a sign of her recognition. At her nod he continued, "She has asked for a private audience with you."

A servant entered and unobtrusively served the tea and cakes. Garnet sipped her tea and then asked. "Whatever for? Is something wrong?"

The fine teacup seemed too dainty in his big, calloused hands, but Steiner exercised what gentlemanly know-how he had and sipped the hot tea. "No. Not at all. Nothing's wrong. She wants to talk to you about General Beatrix." Anticipating her next question, he added, "Nothing is wrong, I assure you. Actually, she wants to talk to you about me, too."

The young queen seemed terribly confused. If nothing was wrong, why did Ruby want to talk about the commanders of her personal guard and the Alexandrian guard respectively? "Go on," she prodded, hoping he'd offer more of an explanation.

"Well, that is all, really." A gulp of tea burned down his throat and he decided to set the cup down before the nervous trembling spread to his hands. Was he nervous just because he was talking about Beatrix? Tired of dancing around the subject, he blurted, "Actually, I'm in love with her and I need your help, majesty-yours and Ruby's to help me tell her how much I love her."

Garnet's eyes lit with understanding. She almost laughed into her tea, but forced it back into a fond smile. Is that what all the trouble was for? Steiner was courting Beatrix again. He was so nervous this time, though. A deep romantic at heart, Garnet decided to help those two get together as soon as possible. In her eyes, they made a wonderful couple. They both needed each other, too. Naturally, the complimented one another. That, and as Steiner sat there, waiting for her to say something, she could see the raw emotion in his eyes. He really wanted this. What kind of friend would she be if she denied him that?

"Tell Ruby she's invited to breakfast, then," she said with a smile. "Make certain your dinner jacket is clean by tomorrow evening."

The big knight was elated and had all the reserve of a pleased little boy while trying to hide it. "Yes ma'am!" He tried to keep his tone serious, but the anticipation was just too much. Garnet laughed aloud to see him wiggle in his chair. How could such a big man be so boyish? This was only one of two times she'd ever had a chance to see this side of her protector. She enjoyed it, too. It reminded her so much of her lost love.

Steiner's elation melted away as Garnet's mood quickly turned somber again. Had the discussion on love steered her thoughts back to Zidane, he wondered? Maybe now was the time to leave. "Thank you, your majesty-Garnet. As a friend, I thank you." His tone was sympathetic and laden with guilt. Garnet did her best to force a smile for him. He could see the tears clinging to the corners of her eyes. It pained him so much to see her like that. He eased from his chair and kneeled next to hers. Garnet wrapped her arms around Steiner's neck and cried silently into his shoulder. This had all happened before. Steiner stroked her back and let her cry herself to sleep again.

Ignoring the stiffness in his joints from maintaining the same position for so long, Steiner lifted Garnet from her chair and carried her to her canopied bed. There he layed her down gently. She'd likely only catch an hour or two of troubled sleep, but she needed every moment of it. Steiner stood near the window with the moonlight glinting off his armor. He whispered a prayer to whatever gods watched over scoundrels that stole beautiful queens' hearts. He prayed that Zidane returned soon.

--

Though the messanger took his time, Ruby arrived promptly for a private breakfast with the Queen. The two talked and laughed like old friends. Steiner stood outside the banquet hall, pacing and trying not to eavesdrop. Another guard approached the hall to take up her position as a guard. Steiner waved her away impatiently. "Go guard the main hall," he commanded in hushed tones. "This post is covered."

The young soldier took a step back and regarded Steiner dubiously. She wasn't certain if it was Steiner's place to order anyone but his knights around. However, she wasn't about to directly disobey a superior's orders. With a quick nod and a 'yes sir' she hurried off to her new post and hoped dearly that general Beatrix wouldn't be cross with her.

A servant proceeded the Queen and Ruby as they exited the hall after two solid hours of talking. They were both still laughing and carrying on like two excited schoolgirls. Both ignored Steiner as he stood by the banquet doors at attention. He watched them with interest, wishing he could glean a little of their conversation. Everything seemed to be going well, but what about them getting him and Beatrix together? Hopefully, they hadn't forgotten.

--

Later that afternoon, Steiner stood in his customary position beside the Queen. Beatrix stood on the opposite side, silent as always. Ruby had been invited to attend court, too. She sat among the other nobles, dressed in a lavish, borrowed dress. She seemed pretty bored with her company though. Steiner watched her with interest. It always amazed him how consummate and actress Ruby was. In one moment, she seemed to enjoy the company of the other nobles. In the next, she was pursing her lips and looking as bored as he'd ever seen her. Then again, acting was all part of the court. Maybe she could become a permanent edition if she wanted.

After two and a half grueling hours court was dismissed. The queen rose from her throne and gestured to both Beatrix and Steiner to stay put. Beatrix shot a curious glance at Steiner, but he simply shrugged. He honestly had no idea what her plan was, or if this was the beginning of it. The queen crossed the floor to where Ruby sat. Some nobles mingled close to Ruby hoping to catch some gossip, but they were all shooed away (and each one very indignant about it) by the queen. Ruby and Garnet nodded in unison.

Ruby waved Steiner to join her, "Oh, Cap'n. Would ya'll mind escortin' me?" 

Steiner looked to Garnet for confirmation. The queen nodded with a smile and then made a gesture similar to Ruby's to Beatrix. "General, if I may have a moment of your time?"

The general left the dias with a firm, "Of course, your majesty." She joined Garnet and watched Steiner escort Ruby away.

"Beatrix? How do you feel about an evening off duty?" Garnet chirped as she led the general out of the courtroom though a servant's passage.

--

"Steiner-honey, ya'll been gainin' some weight, I think." Ruby gave a tug and buttoned the last button on Steiner's dinner coat. She did have to admit that the older man looked rather dashing out of his armor and dressed like a gentleman.

The large knight frowned and turned back the loose sleeves of his red jerkin. He had to admit that his breeches did feel a little snug. Perhaps it was time to have a tailor update his finer wardrobe. Ruby offered him a pair of soft, mu skin gloves. The supple leather hugged his large hands, making them seem more graceful but no less strong. While he pulled on his large-brimmed, plumed hat, Ruby pulled a wide yellow sash around his middle. The sash helped hide the straining buttons around Steiner's waist as well as the buckles of the leather shoulder belt from which hung the sword of his station. The young actress stepped back to take in the full effect. With his slightly-heeled boots, Steiner had been transformed from an intimidating knight, to a fine (if not broad-shouldered) man of the court.

In play, Ruby curtsied before him and sweetly said, "Why sir, Ah don't think Ah've ever had the pleasure." She extended a hand, knuckles up toward the man.

With a smile, Steiner actually played along and cradled her hand in his. His lips brushed her silk gloves and he rumbled, "The pleasure is all mine, Lady Ruby."

Ruby laughed lightly. It had been a glorious day already. She hardly remembered having so much fun around a bunch of stuffy peacocks. Well, not since she'd been around Tantalus had she had so much fun, anyway. She flicked a green chocobo plume out of the knight's face and then gave him a tender pat on the cheek. "Ya'll gonna miss yer date now, honey. We best get goin'." 

--

Amber light cast a warm glow all around the ballroom. The brass and copper fixtures on the walls caught the subdued firelight and tinged it a very romantic red. As Queen Garnet strode to the center of the room, Beatrix complained under her breath. The general stopped and shifted her wide skirt for the fifth time that night. Her petticoats rustled like autumn leaves. Practical, but still courtlly, her rich sienna dress was accented with golden embroidered roses. On her left breast, rested one, perfect pink rose-the only mark of her station that Garnet would allow her to wear. 

"Did you say something, Beatrix?" Garnet turned and her white skirt swept the highly-polished floor.

Beatrix lowered her gaze and said through clenched teeth, "I feel naked without my sword, your majesty."

The soft amber light lent Garnet's eyes a peculiar, honey-like color. That color was only enhanced as she smiled. "That's what I thought you said." She was truly enjoying herself. This little bit of mischief was welcome after the hundreds of dredging days she'd just suffered through. "Don't worry, Beatrix. We have guards posted around the ballroom, and the Knights of Pluto are on patrols around the castle."

Was that supposed to make Beatrix feel at ease? She tried not to let her exasperation show. The queen was enjoying herself and Beatrix knew that she dearly needed this bit of mischief. What she couldn't understand, though, is why she had to be dragged along in the midst of it. After bolstering her corset, Beatrix asked, "So how may I be of service, your majesty?"

Still wearing that warm, gentle smile, Garnet pointed back toward the enormous double doors that led into the ballroom. Beatrix turned in time to see a finely clad man and woman pass into the amber light. The plumes on the man's hat dipped with each easy step. At his side, the woman walked with a poise and grace befitting royalty. Were these two ambassadors from another kingdom?

The queen brushed by Beatrix and ran up to the man. Rather than greeting him, she walked around his side and seemed to appraise him. "Oh, I like this very much, Steiner! Ruby, you've outdone yourself."

Steiner??! Beatrix did a double-take. Steiner swept off his wide-brimmed hat, revealing his dark, close cropped hair. He bowed with a flourish and the plumes of his hat swept the polished floor. "My Queen, Lady Beatrix. You both look stunning tonight."

Beatrix seemed to be the one stunned to silence, however. She had seen Steiner out of his metal armor before, but never in such a lavish costume. He seemed a different man altogether. Beatrix wasn't certain how to react to the change.

"General Beatrix, meet Captain Adelbert Steiner, your escort for tonight," Garnet chimed in as if cued.

"An' a fine escort if Ah do say so myself, General," Ruby added.

Steiner reached out and coaxed Beatrix's hand into his with gentle fingertips. He pet the back of her hand and then bent to let his lips linger on her knuckles. What had they fed Steiner to make him so self-assured in courtly romance, Beatrix wondered.

A blush deepened her cheeks, but all she could manage was an indignant, "What is the meaning of this?"

Both Garnet and Ruby withdrew with a hasty, "That's up to you," and 'We're all gonna leave the rest up tah cupid's arrow, sugah. Buh-bye now."

The Pluto Knight and the World-renown general stood there in the middle of the ballroom, as unmoving as a portrait. Finally, Beatrix tugged her hand back and demanded, "Steiner, what's going on?"

The large man straightened, squared his shoulders and stated, "Something I should have done a long time ago, Beatrix."

Long, curling tendrils of brown hair bounced over the generals shoulders as she stated emphatically, "We both agreed-"

Steiner cut in with an upraised hand and a quick, "Ssh!" He stepped closer to her and looked into her eyes. "I wasn't sure if I could separate my heart from my duty then. Now I know the one certain truth in my heart"

Beatrix shook her head and took a pointed step back. "I'm not going to listen to it this time. This is ridiculous, Steiner, and a waste of my time and yours. I just-"

A gloved finger pressed her lips together. Under any other situation, she would have batted the offending hand away, but Steiner's words caused her pasue. "I love you, Beatrix."

The general's one good eye cast downward and she fell silent. Young, naïve feelings that she'd buried under duty and cause rose again, fluttering behind her breast. Love wasn't for her, especially with this bumbling idiot, but before Bahamut's attack thoughts for him were kindled with a ridiculous mix-up involving a little girl and a love letter. These feelings weren't entirely unwelcome, they were just surprising. At the time, she lost herself in the hope behind that passion. Then she came to realize she honestly couldn't respect Steiner. However, his actions proved her wrong, but by that time she was lost again in her duty. They had both agreed to call the entire mess off in favor of serving their kingdom.

Steiner's voice pulled her out of her reverie. In a warm, gentle voice he requested, "Beatrix, please say something. Don't say 'no', but please don't stay silent."

The general closed her eye and rested her palms against her voluminous skirt. "I should have known what you were trying to do all this time. You were acting strange because you were trying to court me again." A small laugh shook her shoulders and slowly, she let her gaze trail back up to Steiner's strong-lined face. "You sentimental fool. Why couldn't you have just told me, rather than"she raised her arms, indicating the room in general.

The captain held out his hands to Beatrix and admitted, "Every time I tried, words got in my way. I'm sorry, but I'm desperate at this point. I feel better now that I've said it."

Beatrix placed her hands in his, and despite her more pragmatic side, she stepped close to him and let him guide her arms around his waist. Together, they began to sway to an unheard song. "You never were good with words, Adelbert."

"I have a terrible time adequetly expressing my emotions for you." He hugged her muscular shoulders as they slow danced. "My heart aches with the burning-"

"Adelbert?" Beatrix mumbled into the front of his jerkin.

"Yes, my love?"

"Please don't spoil this moment."

--

Garnet peered through the crack between the doors. "Wow, that went better than expected," she marvled at the two slow dancing together.

Ruby nodded and examined her fingernails smugly, "Ah figure they just needed some time all alone. Don't ya think they make a beautiful couple, sugah?"

Easing the door closed, Garnet admitted, "Not at first, but seeing how they move together-it's just amazing. I wonder why they didn't get together sooner."

A mischievous grin played on Ruby's lips. "Have ya'll ever seen the Captain's poetry, honey?"

Garnet perked with curiosity. "No? Is it bad?"

The young actress laughed and began walking down the hall. "I don't think 'bad' even begins tah describe it, ya majesty. C'mon now. Let's leave them two alone, huh?"

With a light step, Garnet left her seat by the door and joined Ruby down the hall. "I'd say we earned ourselves some ice cream."

Ruby smile to the young Queen and proclaimed, "Ah love yer thinkin', darlin'!" With that, the two disappeared around the bend.

Epilogue.

Aboard the Prima Vista, life went on as usual. Baku tromped back onto the deck and bellowed, "MAIL CALL!" In his arms were bundles of documents and one parcel. "Marcus, Cinna, heads up!"

Cinna turned in time to see the parcel zooming in on his face. Marcus reached out and tapped the package off it's trajectory right before impact. As Cinna cowered, the bigger man turned the box over in his hands. "Hmm, it's from Alexandria. I wonder if it's that new knife I ordered."

Opening one eye and then the other, Cinna peered between his fingers. Seeing the coast was clear, he lowered his hands. "Hey!" he demanded, "The boss said it's for me too. C'mon, let me open it."

Marcus danced back, holding the box just out of Cinna's reach. "Maybe next time,bro," he chuckled as he began to tear away the brown wrapping.

Cinna made another jump for the box, upsetting Marcus' hold on it. The two scrambled after the box as it tumbled to the ground. "It's mine!" Cinna insisted as he tackled it. Marcus dogpiled on top of him and tried to wrestle it away. Finally, the box gave up under all the abuse and tore open. Oglops literally poured from the hole in the parcel. The crawled and lept over the two, stunned men.

Both Cinna and Marcus lept to their feet and brushed at their clothing. "Aaah! I hate oglops!" they cried in unison.

With a look of utter confusion, Blank peered through the cloud of swarming oglops at Baku. The boss only held his gut and laughed heartily. How could that man laugh with oglops leaping all over the ship. Ah well, just another day on the Prima Vista.  


Author's note: Well, that's it. Thank you all for your feedback. This all worked out a little differently than I expected. Anyway, for those of you who are wondering, this all happens about a month before Zidane's return. If you have any other questions, please feel free to email me. The Pink Tonberry loves to hear from readers. [mercybrand@hotmail.com][1]

   [1]: mailto:nockerbrat@yahoo.com



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